Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

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Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Wanna hear a joke? no

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops