Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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