Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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