Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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i dont fisish anythi

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

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Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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When I became a WoMan, no, its a nice subject, I do not mind at all.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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