Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops