My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some roses are white 72.4% of Americans are too

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Potassium? K.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops