Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

quantum physics?

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...