tea with milk?

23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

Nobody cares maddie!

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

What's brown and sticky? My ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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