wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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What do you call 100 Americans at the bottom of the ocean? A US submarine crew.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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