What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

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The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

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Your adopted

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.?

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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