Chlamydia

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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first

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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why did the man steal change from the tip jar? he wanted another state quarter for his collection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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