how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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