What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

What's just not right? Left

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

american idol

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

I hate it when people dont finish there sen

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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