What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

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the lemon was sweet.

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A duck walks into a bar *************************** Later that day the homeless man had duck for dinner.

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As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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