Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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