Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

What is life? Paul.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...