Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +1

yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops