What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

asdasdasdasd

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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