Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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What is not a car park? Clash of clans

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What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

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cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops