What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone. He proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

Whats 1+1? window!

Three left giraffe testicles fell out of the sky and into a woman's grocery bag. "Did you know that 16 people die from dolphin rape every year? said Adolf Hitler as he began eating a horse.

A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

How do five gay guys walk? In One Direction: data:image/jpeg;base64,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

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...