Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He stepped on a piece of a shattered bottle from a bar fight. Don't worry, though, it was just a little cut and he felt fine after a few beers.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Good job, son.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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