How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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69

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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A frenchman, an englishman, and an italian walk into a bar. They proceed to drink their beer in silence, because they can't understand each other one bit.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops