A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What hurts like hell? HELL

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +8

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops