Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

I believe if Floyd Mayweather fought Muhammad Ali I believe it would be a close fight but Floyd would win. Because Ali has Parkinson's

Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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