How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Roses are red And heres something new Violets are violet They're not friggin blue

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What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

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Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

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A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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