A Canadian walks into a bar, he rubs his head, steps around the bar, and walks into a bar. He has a great time hanging out with his friends and having a few drinks

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock. Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops