Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

What is worst then a blond trying to pass collage?....... There is nothin wrong with that

Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

I'm homeless.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

steven hawking walks into a bar

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...