Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

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One, two, three, four and five

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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What's dry and unpleasant to eat? Sand.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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