Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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Why don't men want to marry virgins? They are wary of women who are inexperienced and who they may be sexually incompatible with.

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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