how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

What is a jew in space? Dead

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

What stops a train? A missile

Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

All of these jokes are about white people

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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