What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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My girlfriend said she doesn't like anti jokes and now i'm single ha ha just kidding.... she's dead

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

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Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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