An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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A hispanic priest with a huge boner walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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