whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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