Sir, your wife is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

thumb_up thumb_down -11

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you call a man who likes other men? A fag

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you make your house smell bad? fart

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does a white man say when you slug him in the face with a club. Ow.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops