Why did the black man have drugs? He had a very serious medical condition that involved putting himself at a high risk at any time without proper medications, therefore he requires drugs to sustain him and hopefully prevent him from dying. To immediately believe that he was in possession of illegal drugs is a very racist assumption that is representative of one of the numerous racial problems that faces our society today.

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

Why are hurricanes named after women? I don't know I was asking you

What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew are stranded in the middle of the ocean on a raft. They all die of dysentery.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

What did the piano say to the guitar? "G, it's not A nice day. B careful, Dee." What did the guitar say to the piano? "F you!" What did the piano reply? "Eek! C you later!"

If life gives you AIDs, make lemonaids.

How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

What did the cow say to his family before he left the house? goodbye, because he was going to the slaughter house to get killed for meat

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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