What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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