Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +2

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops