What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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