What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

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Guy1: Hey! Do you want to hear a potassium joke? Guy2: Sure! Guy1: K

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what word starts with the letter N and ends with the letter R that you never wanna call a black person? Neighbor

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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Why are Asians good at Math? Because they are bad at English.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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