a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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What did the dead guy say to the other guy? "You murdered me." How did he hear the dead guy? He was dead too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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What did the Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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what do you call 3 black men in a line up? their names

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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What did the dad say when the irresponsible goth problem child asked for a gun Yes

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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