You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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