What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

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whats worse then finding a bad antijoke on this site? finding a real joke on this site

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

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All of these jokes are about white people

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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