You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

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Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy? They have different colors of skin.

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A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

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What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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what's the funniest joke? wish i knew

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops