What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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