What is long hard and woody? A tree.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

your mum

I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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