What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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