Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

why wouldnt you come to the dark side? i spit in the cookies

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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