what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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