Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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There was once a man who lived in a box.

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

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What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

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women's rights

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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I found a new way to be condescending... Thats when you talk down to people.

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A man walks into a bar, asks the bartender for a beer. Bartender says, "That'll be $3.50." Man says,"The joke maker did not explain monetary transactions."

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops