Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Banana soup, Gorilla poop

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops