What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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bite me

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

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What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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