what are three short words? i a am

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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A antijoke? The "new and better" Duke Nukem. "Power armor is for poossies! My ego is going to... ARGH! Both my arms are blown away... well Duke Nukem is too awesome! He uses his legs..ARGH MY LEGS! Well Duke Nukem is dead... but his ego will keep the remains of his corpse fighting aliens! Yeah ego!" Nukem: I got balls of fail...

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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