Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's funny? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An asian man and a black man were having a conversation. The asian man sneezed. The black man got SARS and he died shortly after.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

thumb_up thumb_down -15

-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Guess what? You guessed it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An orphan falls off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops