Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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Little johnny raised his hand one day in class and asked if he could use the restroom. The teacher said he had to say the abc's first. Johnny successfully recited the abc's and then proceeded to use the restroom.

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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Knock knock. Come right on in.

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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This is an anti- joke

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

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What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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I walk into a bar...

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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What is not a car park? Clash of clans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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